Anthea Turner Deprecation Society

[ PICTURE: Anthea looking rather horrid ]

[ Harvey the rabbit-boy ]
Sponsored by Dave's Auto Repairs, 113 Choumert Grove, Peckham - your one-stop corrugated iron lean-to for all your automotive repair & respray requirements. Number plates exchanged. Blood removed from bumpers. Damning physical evidence removed to police forensic standards. Gunshot victims removed from boot. As recommended by actor Harvey Keitel.

"Dave's Autos asked no awkward questions", says Harvey. "I know I can rely on them for efficient and friendly service at any time of night."

  1. Anthea's favourite food is beans.
  2. Anthea owns a teddy bear called Brian.
  3. Anthea owns six goldfish.
  4. Anthea wears contact lenses.
  5. Anthea goes to bed at 9.30 every night.
  6. Anthea is not the bubbly, sweet-natured 'girl next door' she makes herself out to be. In reality she is a notorious curmudgeon.
  7. Anthea's favourite singer is Rod Stewart. Says it all, really.
  8. Anthea's favourite drink is Guinness. Good choice.
  9. Anthea has an even more annoying sister.
  10. Anthea prefers tights to stockings.
  11. Anthea spends a good deal of her time denying that she once appeared in a truly piss-poor fitness video called the 'Y-plan'. But we know better.
  12. Anthea looked jolly shifty the other day on GMTV when she had to introduce a report about whether the National Lottery was ruining people's lives. As well she might.

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